Cochlear implants are a promising intervention for children who have Essay

Cochlear implants are a promising intervention for children who have hearing impairments. However, a fractious debate prevails c - Essay Example They believe that clinical trials have gray areas, which should be addressed before the implants are used on children. The varying viewpoints create a tug-of-war. Cochlear implants change the life of the deaf people in the mainstream society, but its gray areas in scientific research and clinical trials raise skepticism and arouse feelings the implants can destroy the deaf culture. The Cochlear Implant Debate Cochlear implants are the best solution for deafness in the current times. They are small electrical devices which in the inner ear. Cochlear implants stimulate the auditory nerves in the inner ear sending signals directly to the brain. According to James and colleagues (2005) and Papsin and Gordon (2007), cochlear implants can help children develop good language skills. They believe that implants at a young age stimulate the cochlear subsequently regaining its functions partially. In fact, cochlear implants preserve function of some ear cells. Gantz and colleagues point out ear preservation improves from 10% to 30% after cochlear implants. The deaf can live a normal life with cochlear implants. They can watch television, make calls and interact with other people freely. The self-esteem of the deaf improves remarkably allowing them to perform better in their school work and jobs. This has changed the lives of many people. Some who have made it to the university point out, they would not have made it that far without the implants (Blume, 2009). A study in an Australian school confirms children with cochlear implants improved in their school exams. They also interacted well with the other children improving their emotional and psychological wellbeing. Punch and Hyde (2011) also found out there was general acceptance of the children who got cochlear implants by other children. People who have experienced what it is to be deaf in a mainstream society appreciate Cochlear implants. Wilson and Dorman (2008) point out the deaf have major challenges communicating t o other people. They use the sign language which few people understand the meaning creating large communication barriers. Although cochlear implants improve the lives of many people, some deaf people detest them. The major school of though here is cochlear implant surgery pose major health risks. According to them, the surgery is done around sensitive body organs. Balkany and Gantz confirm cochlear implant surgery is done around major nerves, including those responsible for facial movements. Doctors performing the surgery may tough the nerves inappropriately by accident compromising their function. The face of the person would be inclined towards the side the surgery was done. In addition, the remaining good cells in the ears could be damaged leading to worse deafness or diseases (U.S Food and Drug Administration, 2013). Researchers and surgeons agree cochlear implants surgery risks infectious diseases like pneumococcal meningitis. Risks are high if the patient is not immunized agai nst the pneumococcal bacteria. Children are at higher risks of getting the condition compared to adults. Surgeons are cautioned to know the history of the patient well before starting the surgery. However, surgery cannot be delayed because a patient is not immunized against the pneumococcal bacteria (Medical and Healthcare Products regulatory Agency, 2013). It is worth noting cochlear implant beneficiaries have to live a cautious life. The implants are made of metals, which can set off alarm systems, metal

Organisational structures Essay Example for Free

Organisational structures Essay An organisation can be defined as a group of people who work over a period of time together to achieve a common goal or objective. An organisational structure can be classified into a number of different types, examples are listed below: * Tall, flat, hierarchal * Line structures * Line and staff structures * Centralised and decentralised structures * Matrix structures Mars Confectionery in Slough comprises two factories and an office, all of which are situated in Slough Trading Estate. Their factories operate around the clock, 24 hours a day. The two main types of chart are a flat organisational chart and a tall organisational chart. A flat organisational chart is used when a company have very little hierarchy; there are few levels of authority and more departments. A tall organisational chart shows the hierarchical structure of the organisation, the different levels of authority. 2.4a Flat Organisational Charts- A flat organisational chart is when an organisation has very little hierarchy, there are few levels of authority. Mars have a tall organisational structure and also a tall hierarchal structure. The managing Director is at the top and below are seven departments. Each department is made up of a team. Flat Tall The advantages of an organisational chart is that is shows the position of your company at a particular time- needs reviewing. It can show anomalies and efficiency- shows faults in fundamental structure. It also shows new employees and shows a broad outline of the company and where they fit in. It is also essential for the day to day planning. The disadvantages are that it shows formal organisation- not personalities (people mould job). And it may lead to disputes if not applied rigidly. It also shows that companies status at only one point in time (when the chart is being drawn). After it has been drawn a new employee may start up at the organisation and then the old chart would need to be upgraded. This type of structure provides possibilities for promotion for any staff. Mars use critical thinking this is where managers are looking to promote someone with initiative, who can handle difficult situations and make the right decisions quickly. An organisational chart is a diagrammatic presentation of the structure of an organisation, showing the department within that organisation e.g. Finance, RD, Administration, Personnel, Marketing, Sales Logistics and Production. An organisational chart also shows the level of responsibility and authority for individuals or departments, it also shows the span of control, so the number of people a person in supervising. At Mars they operate a line structure is the relationship between a senior and a subordinate at any level within the organisation. This is simple to understand so staff know exactly where they are in the structure. Managers will also have a clear understanding of the roles of people when allocating work. A centralised organisation is when decisions are made at the top of the organisation and the activities are shared out centrally. The advantage of centralisation are that the senior management is aware of how both internal external factors are likely to affect individual departments and the organisation in general. Decentralised structures are used when managers or supervisors take the authority in decisions The Mars decentralised because the head of each department has the authority to make decisions; therefore this saves time allow managers to take control of the work undertaken by their department and motivates staff because they have more responsibility. A matrix structure can be used by Mars when they are going to develop or launch a new product as it enable people from each functional area in order to complete the task. There are six types of organisational structures, which are line structures, staff structures, Functional structures, matrix structures, Centralised and De-Centralisation. 2.4b Line Structures Each unit is a microcosm of the whole. Each unit will have its own specialised staff carrying out the specialist management function. In a line structure, a company is usually organised into functional department, each headed by a senior manager, below whom is a chain of command. This shows there is a line of authority and responsibility as you go down the structure. For example, in Mars in the production department the line may pass down from production director to production manager, quality control, plant manager, process control, production supervisors and finally operatives. Each person in the line has authority of the one below. The advantages of a line structure is that it is simple to understand because staff know exactly where they are in the structure. Managers in Mars have a clear understanding of the roles of people when allocating work and spend less time monitoring work because subordinates are not distracted or confused by instructions from other sources. A well establishes line authority makes it possible for work to be delegated further down the line. Mars would use the line structure as it is simple to understand because staff know exactly where they are in the structure. The disadvantages are that it can involve a very long chain of command. Instructions may take a considerable amount of time to filter from the top and impact on the functional department, which would be a major drawback on a company in a rapidly changing market. Individuals may only respond to commands from their direct superior. The flow of information up the chain of command may take a long time, causing delays. 2.4c Staff Structures The senior management In Mars have a team of advisors to help them co-ordinate the activities of the whole organisation. A Mars member with the staff authority can provide services and advice to those in the line of authority in other departments. The training and recruitment of Human Resources management department are bound to involve other departments. Senior staff of Mars in the production department may have staff authority in the purchasing department. Mars staff in the finance department may have staff authority across all departments. Managers within Mars do not have the power or authority to control or give instructions, but rather the authority to deal with other departments and offer advice and services in relation to their problems. The advantages of staff structures are that it enables expertise and experience of specialists to be used to a greater extent across the Mars organisation. By having access to all areas of the business managers with staff authority can coordinate the organisations objectives and ensure a more immediate response to changes in technology or market conditions. Staff authority prevents individual departments from being too inward looking. In Mars it makes communication more efficient, without staff authority, communications between departments are a director level, and so any inter departmental communication ahs to pass up the chain of command in one department to director level and then down the other before it reaches the appropriate level. The disadvantages of a line and staff structure are that there is a risk that staff authority may diminish the authority of individuals in line management, particularly is those with staff functions acquire informal power and authority. In Mars this can lead to some subordinates becoming confused about whether they should take instructions from and be responsible to their line managers with staff authority. It can lead to clashes of personality and options. This may strain relations between staff, affecting productivity and morale. 2.4d Matrix Structures A matrix structure is an organisational structure set out as a grid, which shows the different ways an individual can be affected by authority. Here the projects need a variety of people from each functional area and there will be two managers that individual employees will have to report to. The advantages of the matrix structure are; making sure there is co-ordination between departments this is because it moves into the boundaries of each department boundary. This encourages greater flexibility and creativity, which is produced by the cross-fertilisation of knowledge and skills. It also enables lower staff to gain experience in management of a project team, which could be preparing them for promotion to become a higher manager. A disadvantage, however is that it can lead to confusion between project teams as individuals are involved in a large number of different relationships which create a complex pattern of authority and responsibility. In Mars they use a matrix structure which consists of specialist expertise who concentrate in specialist departments. Specialist staff are allocated to work on specialist projects. Project managers in Mars are responsible for completing the project calling on departmental specialise as they are needed. Promotion to higher levels of management is primarily based on technical expertise- merit or seniority. Communication chains are primarily downloaded and take the from of instructions and commands. This is an example of a Matrix structure used in Mars: Chief Executive The Mars Organisation structure is a grid showing the different ways an individual can be affected by authority. Here the projects need authority of people from each functional area and individuals will have to report to two managers. Organisational structures are divided by 1 product, 2 process, 3 customer, 4 geographical area. Division by product is when the organisation is separated by product lines. The advantages of a Mars matrix organisational structure is that it promotes an increased coordination between departments because it cuts across departmental boundaries-it encourages greater flexibility and creativity produced by cross fertilisation of knowledge and skills. It also allows for the involvement of relatively junior staff in Mars, giving them valuable experience in a wider field for the expression and application of their popular skills. The staff lower down the line structure can also gain valuable management development in a project team, preparing them for promotion. The involvement from specialists in other areas reduces the risks of resources being wasted on projects with no future. Matrix structures do have their disadvantages, the existence of a matrix structure in Mars and project teams can lead to confusion as individuals are involved in a large number of different relationships creating a complex pattern of authority and responsibility. A line manager may resent a subordinate receiving orders from anyone other than him or herself. 2.4e Centralised Organisations A centralised organisation is when decisions are made at the top of the organisation and the activities are carried out centrally. E.g. if a item needs to be purchased then all the purchases must go through the purchasing team. NO BODY has the authority to purchase separate items. Mars is not an example of a centralised organisation. Centralisation is where an organisation carries out its activities centrally in the business, so for example if an organisation wished to purchase equipment the purchasing department would carry it out, because no one else has the authority to do that. Most of the decisions are taken by employees at the top of the organisation and further down, they dont need to make decisions. An advantage of centralisation is the fact that the management team is aware of how much internal and external factors effect each individual department and the organisations general, meaning decisions can be made, based on what Mars needs as a whole. 2.4f De-Centralisation Is when each department manager has the ability to organise his own services making the decision on a day to day bases for his functional area. Mars is an example of a decentralised organisation; because the authority to make decisions on many activities is put to managers and sometimes maybe even supervisors, which is what takes place in Mars. This means that each department manager has the ability to organise there own services, making the decision on a day to day basis for their functional area. 2.4g The relationship between Culture and structure and management: There is a clear relationship between the structure and the culture of the Mars organisation. Tall organisations tend to have a culture based on a them and us attitude, which depends on where individuals stand in the hierarchy. There is likely to be a authoritarian culture. Mars have a tall organisational structure and also a tall hierarchal structure. The managing Director is at the top and below are seven departments. Each department is made up of a team. This means that an organisational chart shows the position of your company at a particular time- needs reviewing. It can show anomalies and efficiency- shows faults in fundamental structure. It also shows new employees and shows a broad outline of the company and where they fit in. It is also essential for the day to day planning Flat organisations tend to be more democratic, with multi directional flows of communication between organisational members, there is more likely to be a team approach. Matrix structures are more democratic than tall organisations. In the matrix people will mix with people from more than one functional area, so there is less likely to be a situation where departments become defensive of their territories. The matrix involves process teams this creates bonds between its team members and development of ideas. Hierarchical organisations are based on a top down approach which a main emphasis on communication. Centralised organisations are likely to lead a power based authoritarian structure. The centre of the organisation or team leaders will make or major dictions of the company. Distrust may be a major aspect from the centre of the organisation, people not involved or surrounded by the decision makers ill feel pushed out and unwelcome. An advantage of centralisation is the fact that the management team is aware of how much internal and external factors effect each individual department and the organisations general, meaning decisions can be made, based on what Mars needs as a whole. Decentralised organisations are most likely to be based on democratic structures teamwork and empowerment. Mars are not Delayering they are not laying people off when they want a flat organisational structure. This has not happened in Mars but this has happened in Nestle in 2002 who closed plants and made redundancies.

Educational Goals and Philosophy :: Teaching Education Philosophy

Educational Goals and Philosophy Deciding on a career is a very difficult decision for anyone to make, especially for someone just coming out of high school. I always knew that I wanted to work with children, but I didn’t know what field I wanted to be in. After thinking about what field I could be in that I could work with children the most, I decided to become a teacher. I have always had a great deal of respect for most of the teachers I’ve had and hopefully I will be able to gain that respect from my students. I believe that if you are going to teach, you have to have some degree of love for children. Once any teacher has lost that, I think it is time for them to stop teaching. The two most important things that have inspired me to become a teacher are being able to work with young children all the time and the personal rewards that come with teaching. My biggest goal as a teacher is to make a child want to learn. I believe children in general do want to learn and it is our job as teachers to give them a chance to do that. I think in order for a child to want to learn, we have to make learning fun and interesting. I believe that by relating the students every day lives to the material they are learning will help accomplish this. Knowing that I have taught a child something, have made a child want to learn or have made a difference in a child’s life would be the most rewarding feeling in the world. As a teacher one of the main strategies that I want to incorporate into my classroom is cooperative learning. Cooperative learning gives the students a chance to get to know each other better, to work together on things, and to depend on one another to get things done. Another reason I prefer this type of learning is that instead of one individual person failing or succeeding, it is the group as a whole (sink or swim together).

Indonesian Defense Strategy :: Indonesia Military Technology War Essays

Indonesian Defense Strategy A. Background Indonesian President Megawati Sukarnoputri signed a little-publicized deal at the end of April to purchase four Russia fighter jets and two helicopters as part of a much larger potential order. The decision to buy from Russia was a subject to a United States ban on military purchases; this marks a small but significant shift from Indonesia’s current dependence on United States’ military hardware. The Indonesian military is suffering from acute lack of supplies and parts for its heavy amour as well for light equipment. The United States’ imposed embargo on Indonesia since 1999 has rendered the country’s military equipment and apparatus partly redundant, leaving Indonesia, once a military might in the South East Asian region desperately behind its neighbors. The United States Congressional bans were first put in place in 1991 after the infamous Santa Cruz massacre of pro-independence civilian supporters in East Timor. They were further tightened in 1999, fol lowing the involvement of the Indonesian armed forces (Tentara Nasional Indonesia) in the rampages by pro-Jakarta militia in East Timor. This is not the first time that Indonesia turns to Russia for military hardware supports, as it matter of fact, history has recorded the rise and fall of Russian armaments in Indonesia as an inseparable part of the rise and fall of bilateral relationship between the two. From late 1950s to early 1960s, Indonesia was mainly dependent on Soviet’s arms. At that time Indonesia was in campaign for the reclaim of West Papua, consequently, it needed a large number of weaponry. But United States were reluctant to sell any to Indonesia, because it did not make any sense if they sell weapons that would be used to fight against Dutch, their own ally. Soviet, on the other hand, was being kind to give arms support that would be paid in long-term and low-interest rate debt. The military equipment received from Soviet, especially for the navy, was so enormous that Indonesia became on of the sea power of Asia. But then, relationships between the two got worsen in late 1960s, and Indonesia was having a hard time in maintaining its military power, particularly to keep up with the advance of military technology. Now, almost a half-century afterward, military friendship between Indonesia and Russia revived again. In time of need, Indonesia turns again to Russia. As it mater of fact, Indonesia is facing a hard time dealing with United States’ military embargo.

Ethics in Noble Truth and Eightfold Path Essay

In this paper I will be discussing the concept of the four noble truths and eightfold path within the Buddhist religion. The four noble truths do not give concrete answers to metaphysical questions, unlike other religions. Buddhism teaches human existence is imperfect and the four noble truths are a guide to help steer away from suffering. The four noble truths are important to Buddhist ethics in that they are the way to nirvana and enlightenment. The first noble truth is life is suffering. To live means to suffer and since it is human nature, no one is perfect in any shape or form. While we develop, we inevitably have to endure physical and psychological suffering sooner or later. Each of us, no matter how rich or poor, is going to get sick, grow old, and die. Nothing is permanent, nothing can permanently satisfy us. â€Å" Any aspect of life, no matter how seemingly pleasant, already has the seeds of the suffering that is a common denominator of all human experience† (Young) This is because things change and pass away; everything and everyone we love will someday pass away. The Buddha also taught the reason behind the suffering that individuals experience. The second noble truth is suffering is caused by craving. â€Å"We suffer because our craving leads us to become attached to things or people and deluded as to the real nature of our situation in life (Young). † As long as we are unable to detach of moral pleasures, we will experience suffering. One must learn to overcome these greed, aversion, hatred, jealousy, etc. These conditions are always in hand with society, family, and within one’s self. Recognizing and understanding the second noble truth gives way to the freedom from suffering. The third noble truth is cessation of suffering. It is the complete fading-away and extinction of this craving, its forsaking and abandonment, liberation from it, detachment from it†(welsh). This may be the most significant of all the noble truths, as it reassures us that true happiness is possible. When individuals give up useless cravings and learn to live each day to the fullest, enjoying what each day brings with no expectations, they are able to live a free life. Nirvana arises when an individual becomes free of all sufferings, and eliminates cravings. When an individual is able to attain nirvana, they are able to move on to the next noble truth. The forth noble truth is the means to liberation. This noble truth teaches how to remove all suffering from your life, and explains the various levels of achieving such. So, first of all, in order to gain the good qualities, we need to work on creating all the different conditions that will make those qualities emerge. To develop the various insights of meditation and real wisdom, we need to develop great faith and confidence in the validity and usefulness of that wisdom. Buddhist needs to change their habits so that they have the ability to do all the necessities to make insight and wisdom emerge. Therefore, there are many factors and conditions we must generate within our life that will bring about our happiness. The guide to peace and the end suffering is the eightfold path. The eightfold path is a guideline to ethical teachings and growth of an individual. The goal is to free believers from attachments and ultimately leads to understanding. â€Å" â€Å"Everyone should attempt to live by the eightfold path, and (theoretically) enlightenment is open to anyone, regardless of caste, gender, or whether lay or ordained. † Young. The Eightfold Path consists of three components: wisdom (prajna ): (1) right views and (2) right intention; morality (sila ): (3) right speech, (4) right conduct, and(5) right livelihood; and concentration (samadhi ): (6) right effort, (7) right mindfulness, and (8) right concentration. (Deal). The eightfold path is the way to avoid self-denial and self-indulgence considered the middle way. The first step in the eightfold path is the right view, which falls under the category of wisdom. The right view means understanding the four noble truths and grasping the nature of objects and ideas. Right view is attained, sustained, and enhanced through all capacities of mind. It begins with the insight that all beings are subject to suffering and it ends with complete understanding of the true nature of all things. The second step, which also falls under the component of wisdom, is correct intention. This refers to abandoning one’s own thoughts and desires. This is the step of the eightfold path that one must give up selfish attitudes that lead to more suffering and replace them with the opposite. â€Å"The point is not to nattached from oneself to a particular person but with a caring attitude, but to practice a â€Å"universal goodwill† young† The third step is correct speech. This means to tell the truth, to speak friendly and to talk only when necessary. †Man’s speech must be the truth, his conversation must be edifying and he must not engage in scandal gossip. One should take control with one’s word not only for the sake of truth but to demonstrate control and discipline. † Right speech can be seen as an ethical conduct in Buddhism. The forth step in the eightfold path is that of correct conduct. Young mentions that unwholesome actions lead to unsound states of mind, while wholesome actions lead to sound states of mind. â€Å" Not taking life, not stealing and not having sexual intercourse† (Van Voorst). It is important in Buddhism to concentrate on actions that will help the well beings of others. The fifth step is the right means to livelihood. This path represents earning an honest living. An occupation that is against the other steps of the eightfold path is in return against right livelihood. One should acquire only by legal means, not by illegally; one should acquire it peacefully, without coercion or violence; one should acquire it honestly, not by trickery or deceit; and one should acquire it in ways which do not entail harm and suffering. † (Bodhi) Selling of weapons would be an example of wrong in this religion as the consequences of weapons can cause harm to others. The sixth step in the eightfold path is right endeavor. This step is very important, as it is a necessity to put a conscious effort in what we do. Without right effort less would be able to get achieved. â€Å" Avoiding any sort of unwholesome action that will have a negative karmic influence, and pursuing beneficial deeds. †(Young) being aware of your own mind and not to have a mind that is diluted. This brings us to our next step, the seventh step, which is right mindfulness. This step in the eightfold path refers to the ability to see things without any delusions. â€Å" Right mindfulness refers to the deep, ultimately non-dual, understanding of the body, feelings, mind, and experienced things†(Koller. In the step being consciously aware of all that is that is going on with ones mind and body. Van Voorst states, â€Å" To remain focused on the body in and of itself- he is fervent, aware and mindful- putting away the greed and distress of the world. This step helps to actively observe and control our thoughts. The eighth step in the eightfold path is correct meditation. Once at the stage nirvana is at hand and, in a flash of intuition that state of final bliss dawns† (Young) This step leads to developing a deep insight into reality and the ability to be able to apply levels of concentration regularly. We see by the study of the noble truths and the eightfold path that Buddhist put great emphasis on the practices that they follow in order to reach nirvana. The noble truths and the eightfold path are essentially the ethics of the religion. The foundation of the path is moral virtue. Buddhist ethics is concerned with the practices that contribute to a believer to act in ways that help rather then harm. By following the noble truths and the eightfold path Buddhist are able to reach the goal of nirvana and non-attachment.

Free Essays on Black Men In Public Spaces

themselves. The use of irony is enormously prevalent throughout the entire essay, and is nothing if not indispensable to the overall persuasiveness of his argument. Staples’ use of specific stories becomes essential to the meaning and overall power of the story, and creates the necessary elements that must be included if a writing is to be proper and effective. By using his own life encounters, Staples allows for a first hand understanding of what it was like in that particular situation, and also what he felt during those ordeals. Staples’ stories become such an integral part of the entire piece that without them, the entire essay would be totally lacking, and the emotional gain credited to these stories would be completely lost. This also makes for a much more flowing and sinuous piece, but still attests to the argument that throughout his life, Stap... Free Essays on Black Men In Public Spaces Free Essays on Black Men In Public Spaces In the late 1940’s, racial prejudice began a presumably unending journey, winding through decade after decade, usually lessening, though never completely disappearing. In more recent years, racial acceptance has become much more commonplace and laws formed by United States lawmakers have been implemented to ensure the fair and equal treatment of everyone, regardless of race. However, does this mean that every race is still viewed equally? In the essay entitled â€Å"Black Men and Public Space†, author Brent Staples argues that he has been racially profiled on several occasions, and in doing so, has been falsely assumed to be a threat to the safety of those around him. By employing specific stories, Staples creates an intellectually and emotionally powerful essay. His inclusion of emotion is very effective in pleading his case that he has been racially profiled, and through his own emotions, he forms a completely multi-faceted essay. Also, by writing the entire ess ay in an ironic manner, Staples is able to create an essay that has meaning and rationale far beyond the words themselves. The use of irony is enormously prevalent throughout the entire essay, and is nothing if not indispensable to the overall persuasiveness of his argument. Staples’ use of specific stories becomes essential to the meaning and overall power of the story, and creates the necessary elements that must be included if a writing is to be proper and effective. By using his own life encounters, Staples allows for a first hand understanding of what it was like in that particular situation, and also what he felt during those ordeals. Staples’ stories become such an integral part of the entire piece that without them, the entire essay would be totally lacking, and the emotional gain credited to these stories would be completely lost. This also makes for a much more flowing and sinuous piece, but still attests to the argument that throughout his life, Stap...

Dont Be Too Eager to Publish

Dont Be Too Eager to Publish Dont Be Too Eager to Publish Dont Be Too Eager to Publish By Maeve Maddox My son gave me a mystery the other day. Hed encountered the author at Barnes and Nobles and, having chatted with the man, he felt bound to buy a copy of his book. Well call the writer Author X. Under the attractive dust jacket, the sturdy binding is stamped with the title and authors name in gilt letters. The book could have been produced by a major publisher. As soon as I read the first paragraph, however, I knew that the book had been self-published. With a bit of disguise, heres the first paragraph: The phone jingled on Butch Grands desk and jolted him out of his daydream. He had been thinking about how hot and dry the last two years had been and was hoping this year would be better. As Police Chief of Philadelphia, Mississippi, things just went better for him when it was cooler and they got some rain. The phone rang again and he took the receiver off the hook. Whats the first clue that Author X is not a professional? He tells the reader that the character is having a daydream, and then he tells what the daydream was about. An experienced writer would have placed the reader in the daydream with sensory details, and then jolted him out of it to answer the phone. An experienced writer would probably have had him answer or pick up or perhaps just start talking, and not have told us that the man took the receiver off the hook. See if you can identify any other marks of too little revision. This opening paragraph is followed by a lengthy conversation with a woman who is reporting the discovery of a body at the town dump: No, she didnt discover it, some boys did. And then she puts a boy on the phone and the police chief asks how he spells his name and then he talks to the woman again and wants to know what time she cooks supper and then he tells her that he might not be able to get to the dump right away and then he drifts off again thinking about the fact that the town hasnt had a murder in seven years and then a Hello? at the other end of the line jars him back to business and then he hangs up the receiver and sets the phone back on the desk All this has taken us to page 3. Now we learn that he warned the woman that he might be late because his department has only two patrol cars and both are out with other drivers so he goes to the cafe and gets the Sheriff to drive him to the dump and on the way he thinks about how the dump originated and what the town was like in the 1800s and then they get to the dump where the two men exchange introductions with the boys who found the body and then, finally, on page 8, we see the body. Mysteries can open in various ways. Established authors like Elizabeth George and Sara Paretsky can afford to begin with descriptions of weather and the thoughts of their characters because their readers are confident they are entering a fictional world that has entertained them in the past. First-time authors have to work harder at drawing the reader in with the first paragraph. The body does not have to appear in Chapter One, but if you decide to put it there, get on with it! Consider this opening paragraph: The bodies were discovered at eight forty-five on the morning of Wednesday 18 September by Miss Emily Wharton, a sixty-five-year-old spinster of the parish of St. Mathhews in Paddington, London and Darren Wilkes, aged ten, of no particular parish as far as he knew or cared. P.D. James, A Taste for Death. Like Author X, James delays our first look at the bodies until several pages later. We dont see them until page 9. But where Author X rambles about, talking about this and that, throwing in lengthy conversation and irrelevant detail, James uses the intervening pages to build suspense and horror in the reader. The existence of the bodies is established in the first sentence, but then James makes us wait as she reveals the relationship between the woman and the boy. The more we know about them, the more we want to know what kind of circumstances could have led them to discover dead bodies. When we finally do see the bodies, our horror is greater because we see them through gentle Miss Whartons eyes. The main problem with Author Xs story is that he was too eager to publish. He was not willing to do the revision necessary to turn a draft into a (professionally) publishable manuscript. Want to improve your English in five minutes a day? Get a subscription and start receiving our writing tips and exercises daily! Keep learning! Browse the Fiction Writing category, check our popular posts, or choose a related post below:When to Capitalize Animal and Plant NamesIs There a Reason â€Å"the Reason Why† Is Considered Wrong?Ulterior and Alterior